not that i'm an agent myself...i met a lot of agents in my past (not a KGB spy, or FBI agents, rental agents are the type that i'm talking about here, get into the program!)...i met the ones who can barely speak english (it's so accented that i had to strain my ears to hear them, not that my english sounds like the queen's, mind you, but it is that bad)...here in the land of kiwi accented english, any sort of accents are acceptable...but the accent is so thick, you have to keep saying 'i'm sorry, what did you say again?', that it is a major hurdle to pass...i think you may have to allocate about an hour to ask them to fix your door as you may have to ask them to repeat what they are saying about a minimum of 3 times for every sentence...seriously...
i've met agents who are bitchier than the bitch actress in 'mean girls' (the movie which lindsay lohan acted, see i did watch some movies, i don't live under the rock)...they were abrupt and impatient (hey u chose to be an agent, a work which requires you to work with a lot of 'personalities'...didn't they teach you about pc, as in politically correct?)...they hate you and the best revenge is to charge you mountains and you'll get a pittance from your bond (they hate you that much that they check every itty bitty corner of the apartment when you left)...they have this perpetual bored and you-are-a-useless-human-being-so-go-and-die look on their faces every time you see them...they acted like kings and queens and you are their loyal subjects or 'off with their heads!'...you need to listen to them, not the other way round (or at least mutual listening)...
i've met agents who are sooooo busy that you can do your damnedest but you can't still reach them...they may be busier than the president of united states (not that i know whether the president of united states is busy, or more like, 'go and bomb these countries' to his army and sit back and pat his own back)...you can text them, leave them messages on their phone, email them, call their office or mobile, or even call their spouses every day (hey, i'll do that if i got their spouses' number, just to get hold of these agents)...these are useless strategies...you just have to keep on trying and curse them behind their backs (not for under 18 years of age please)...and pray hard that they'll be there when you make and appointment coz i've seen some who managed to not be there...they may have probably forgotten you...
i've met agents who count your rent before it's due and call you when your rent is half an hour late...they can be late in responding to your complaints and needs (or does not do anything about them at all!) but the bottom line is you must pay your rent a year earlier than your stay (nazis, anyone?)....money rules, nothing else matters...i've also met the alternative breed...the agents don't even asked whether u have paid your bond or not...it's like things like bond, letting fee and advance rent don't exist in their dictionary of life...it makes you start salivating, rubbing your hands in wicked glee and put on the evil face and think 'i can even live rent-free this year!hohoho!'....
ah the last breed is the type that say one thing and give you another...this type will paint a pretty as a rose bush picture of things, such as the size of the rooms in the apartment, and the date that you can move in...but in the end, you will get the rubbish, such as 'the apartment is not ready, so can you sleep on the street for a short while, say a month?'...the trick to deal with this type is you have to grit you teeth, endure, and push for the initial promise every day...you may just have what you want....eventually....or you may annoy them to madness and drive them to suicide...either way, you'll still feel cheated...
is there any more types of agents out there?probably...these are the types that i'm familiar and comfortable with...i guess when they decided to be rental agents, they have this guide of 'how to be any type of agents who are not the type of agents people generally want and need'...in other words, the worst kind...i've yet to meet an agent who is not impatient, rude, understanding and efficient...maybe i can try to be one!hahahaha...
by the way, the picture up there...it's stolen from the net...i typed FBI agent on google and used the image button and tada!i got this picture...see how convenient the net is?
i've met agents who are bitchier than the bitch actress in 'mean girls' (the movie which lindsay lohan acted, see i did watch some movies, i don't live under the rock)...they were abrupt and impatient (hey u chose to be an agent, a work which requires you to work with a lot of 'personalities'...didn't they teach you about pc, as in politically correct?)...they hate you and the best revenge is to charge you mountains and you'll get a pittance from your bond (they hate you that much that they check every itty bitty corner of the apartment when you left)...they have this perpetual bored and you-are-a-useless-human-being-so-go-and-die look on their faces every time you see them...they acted like kings and queens and you are their loyal subjects or 'off with their heads!'...you need to listen to them, not the other way round (or at least mutual listening)...
i've met agents who are sooooo busy that you can do your damnedest but you can't still reach them...they may be busier than the president of united states (not that i know whether the president of united states is busy, or more like, 'go and bomb these countries' to his army and sit back and pat his own back)...you can text them, leave them messages on their phone, email them, call their office or mobile, or even call their spouses every day (hey, i'll do that if i got their spouses' number, just to get hold of these agents)...these are useless strategies...you just have to keep on trying and curse them behind their backs (not for under 18 years of age please)...and pray hard that they'll be there when you make and appointment coz i've seen some who managed to not be there...they may have probably forgotten you...
i've met agents who count your rent before it's due and call you when your rent is half an hour late...they can be late in responding to your complaints and needs (or does not do anything about them at all!) but the bottom line is you must pay your rent a year earlier than your stay (nazis, anyone?)....money rules, nothing else matters...i've also met the alternative breed...the agents don't even asked whether u have paid your bond or not...it's like things like bond, letting fee and advance rent don't exist in their dictionary of life...it makes you start salivating, rubbing your hands in wicked glee and put on the evil face and think 'i can even live rent-free this year!hohoho!'....
ah the last breed is the type that say one thing and give you another...this type will paint a pretty as a rose bush picture of things, such as the size of the rooms in the apartment, and the date that you can move in...but in the end, you will get the rubbish, such as 'the apartment is not ready, so can you sleep on the street for a short while, say a month?'...the trick to deal with this type is you have to grit you teeth, endure, and push for the initial promise every day...you may just have what you want....eventually....or you may annoy them to madness and drive them to suicide...either way, you'll still feel cheated...
is there any more types of agents out there?probably...these are the types that i'm familiar and comfortable with...i guess when they decided to be rental agents, they have this guide of 'how to be any type of agents who are not the type of agents people generally want and need'...in other words, the worst kind...i've yet to meet an agent who is not impatient, rude, understanding and efficient...maybe i can try to be one!hahahaha...
by the way, the picture up there...it's stolen from the net...i typed FBI agent on google and used the image button and tada!i got this picture...see how convenient the net is?
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