Saturday, February 28, 2009

how to be a good agent 101 (or the alternative)


not that i'm an agent myself...i met a lot of agents in my past (not a KGB spy, or FBI agents, rental agents are the type that i'm talking about here, get into the program!)...i met the ones who can barely speak english (it's so accented that i had to strain my ears to hear them, not that my english sounds like the queen's, mind you, but it is that bad)...here in the land of kiwi accented english, any sort of accents are acceptable...but the accent is so thick, you have to keep saying 'i'm sorry, what did you say again?', that it is a major hurdle to pass...i think you may have to allocate about an hour to ask them to fix your door as you may have to ask them to repeat what they are saying about a minimum of 3 times for every sentence...seriously...


i've met agents who are bitchier than the bitch actress in 'mean girls' (the movie which lindsay lohan acted, see i did watch some movies, i don't live under the rock)...they were abrupt and impatient (hey u chose to be an agent, a work which requires you to work with a lot of 'personalities'...didn't they teach you about pc, as in politically correct?)...they hate you and the best revenge is to charge you mountains and you'll get a pittance from your bond (they hate you that much that they check every itty bitty corner of the apartment when you left)...they have this perpetual bored and you-are-a-useless-human-being-so-go-and-die look on their faces every time you see them...they acted like kings and queens and you are their loyal subjects or 'off with their heads!'...you need to listen to them, not the other way round (or at least mutual listening)...


i've met agents who are sooooo busy that you can do your damnedest but you can't still reach them...they may be busier than the president of united states (not that i know whether the president of united states is busy, or more like, 'go and bomb these countries' to his army and sit back and pat his own back)...you can text them, leave them messages on their phone, email them, call their office or mobile, or even call their spouses every day (hey, i'll do that if i got their spouses' number, just to get hold of these agents)...these are useless strategies...you just have to keep on trying and curse them behind their backs (not for under 18 years of age please)...and pray hard that they'll be there when you make and appointment coz i've seen some who managed to not be there...they may have probably forgotten you...


i've met agents who count your rent before it's due and call you when your rent is half an hour late...they can be late in responding to your complaints and needs (or does not do anything about them at all!) but the bottom line is you must pay your rent a year earlier than your stay (nazis, anyone?)....money rules, nothing else matters...i've also met the alternative breed...the agents don't even asked whether u have paid your bond or not...it's like things like bond, letting fee and advance rent don't exist in their dictionary of life...it makes you start salivating, rubbing your hands in wicked glee and put on the evil face and think 'i can even live rent-free this year!hohoho!'....


ah the last breed is the type that say one thing and give you another...this type will paint a pretty as a rose bush picture of things, such as the size of the rooms in the apartment, and the date that you can move in...but in the end, you will get the rubbish, such as 'the apartment is not ready, so can you sleep on the street for a short while, say a month?'...the trick to deal with this type is you have to grit you teeth, endure, and push for the initial promise every day...you may just have what you want....eventually....or you may annoy them to madness and drive them to suicide...either way, you'll still feel cheated...


is there any more types of agents out there?probably...these are the types that i'm familiar and comfortable with...i guess when they decided to be rental agents, they have this guide of 'how to be any type of agents who are not the type of agents people generally want and need'...in other words, the worst kind...i've yet to meet an agent who is not impatient, rude, understanding and efficient...maybe i can try to be one!hahahaha...


by the way, the picture up there...it's stolen from the net...i typed FBI agent on google and used the image button and tada!i got this picture...see how convenient the net is?

copy cats and other related issues...

what?sounds kinda serious...nah...nothing important really...lately i've been feeling so very uhmm fulfilled?ah more like busy...i got involved in a lot of activities and have to meet a lot of people and settle a lot of things...so what do those have to do with copy cats?great question!nothing really...did it grab your attention?good!mission accomplished...hahaha...


anyway, i feel kinda like a copy cat now...i read someone else's blog and now i'm all fired up to write something...now that i start writing, i noticed, really, i have nothing to talk about...my short holiday is coming to end now (cue:a long *sigggggggghhhhhhhh*)...can't say i'm looking foward toward class (what does that seem to you?an unmotivated student?spot on!)...i feel kinda bad, but i wish the holiday is a bit longer...i can laze around and watch a lot of junks (ah don't feel offended my dear korean dramas!you are still first in my heart...err...)...i can also spent skulking around other people's facebook pages (stalker mode: on) and put on nonsense status (i so do love to grab others' attention!)...i can also do my private melodrama diva time, listening to sad love songs (more like break-up, you-are-leaving-me and someone-i-love-dearly-died-and-i-feel-like-dying-now songs) and read tons of romance (again rotting my brain with uselessness)...


i can also spend my free minutes moaning about my financial status (not that i do something about it...like WORK!)...and bemoaning about my useless life right now...i was about to use the word (cue:*tuuuttt*) s*it just now (get it?if not you need to check your brain...nah...jk jk!) to describe my life..i'm afraid i should start stop cursing now...it's addictive...even when i'm in dire financial straits, i still has yet to learn my lesson...i still plan to shop...here cue in keri who's being gentlemanly and will act as my errand boy tomorrow...i plan to buy this lovely table set at stevens that i reaaaaaaaaally can't live without (not that i actually die without it but hey, it's on SALE!)....


what's wrong with girls and sale?it's me who's wrong here...my brain is wired to be unresistant to sale...and clothes...and shoes...and jewelries...and books...and tea set (what??)....and...should stop somewhere before someone starts choking me...anyway, i'm one day away from class season...


another issues: it's raining all day today...what does that mean to me...nothing...i love rain...it makes the summer bearable (summer is coming to an end, welcome AUTUMN!i very much love autumn!summer means sweat, yucks!)...


ah now i remember!i'm so used to reading something in english that when i read someone else's blog in malay, i felt somehow confused...not that my english is so good that i've forgotten my mother-tongue...it just felt different...apparently that lady is very popular online...thousands (did i exaggerate here?) of people read her blog (unlike me who probably got, hmmm, one reader...as in myself...hahahaha)...but the thing is...i can't UNDERSTAND what she was trying to say!


i'm not exaggerating here...it's really confusing to me!i feel like i'm in an alternate universe where people don't actually speak my language...she did some of her posts in english...the thing is, they confused me more!not that her english is bad (and i'm that good), it's just that her sentences are hmmm weird?more like wrong somehow....ahhh...the issue here, why am i criticising her???she doesn't know me and i don't even know her (she will probably think i'm a jealous blogger, that bitch!hahahaha)!....i guess i have nothing important to think about now...that's why i'm becoming bitchier (coz i will focus all my energy towards bitching on other people!)...


as you can see, i can be bitchier when i have nothing to do...bless you, please shoot me when i'm becoming bored...i know this post is very long (and getting longer by seconds)...especially it's about nothing...need to sign off...will write more useless post soon!(don't count ur breath!)


edit: (what???yes this is getting longer...bear with me or just skip this...no one force you to read this!) i just read someone's blog...i keep thinking 'why can't i be as interesting as her?mine is full of bull!!!'...then i sat back and reflected (for about 5 seconds)...and i found that i like my blog (as stereotypical and boring it is)...it's mine...it reflects my eccentricity (or 'normalness', in relative to a lot of other more eccentric people, to quote fazan) and my thoughts...i may not have deep thoughts (about war or world politics or religion or other more important matters), but i have my own depth (defensive?hehehe)...my writing may not be extravagantly great, i won't get a noble prize for writing, i may not even have 100 of readers but hey, at least i read my own blog!hehehe...now, i'm really siging off...i'll leave the rest of my thoughts for my next post (cue:*groan....* more???)

Thursday, February 26, 2009

same ol', same ol'

same topic...again...yes, it's about food, specifically about my tummy...i'm hungry (nothing new here)...i got free lunch today and i ate like there's no tomorrow, but still...i'm still hungry...let me recount on what i ate at lunch...i ate 2 egg croissants (they were tres fabulous!), hmm probably 2-3 mini egg sandwiches, one cinammon danish, 3 custard and marmalade danish pastries, one vegetarian salsa mini sandwich...then, when i got home, i ate about 10 spoonfuls of rice and curry (with a quarter of fried egg from yesterday, yucky as it may sound)...


ah and yes, i'm still here suffering from my hunger pangs...should i cook?too much of a hassle (me the anti-hassle kinda girl)...and about 5 minutes ago i was like 'aha!found some candies!'...i ate 2 of those...did i forget to mention that i drank a breakfast juice (u know the disgustingly healthy one with lots of carbohydrate and 5% of fat?)....it was so yummy that i wished i took more (stealing from uniguide breakfast tray, but hey, it's free for all!)...


it's almost hilarious how i can get from full to hunger in like a few seconds (like one of those aston martin spiders, not the wiggly insect, the car, yes my favourite one)...i can list a few of my girlfriends who are just like me...yes u know who u r...if u read this, then i especially dedicate this nothing-but-food-and-instant-hunger post for u guys...again, i know u know who u are!^^


hey i'm off to scavenge some food...i feel like the rats now...or possums...or whatever animals that eat on leftovers...*sigh*....

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

melodrama

i've stated this before...i'm a melodramatic person...i may not act or look like one, but i swear to god i am one...i love tragic love stories...i'm also addicted to sob movies and books...anyway, to make long story short (this is an extremely short post for a blabber mouth like me), i fell in love with this song and i'm not letting go anytime soon...it's called starlight tears by kim yoo kyung...i first heard it from the teen drama 'boys before flowers' (tacky title yes, and i'm pretty sure, after much deliberation on my part, that i don't understand what the title presents...though, there are heaps of pretty boys in the drama *droolssssss*)...the song is about errr....nah i won't tell you what it's about...i AM making this post short....

here you go:

Kim Yoo Kyung - Starlight Tears

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

contrary creature

yes that's what we are (or at least i'm pretty sure i am)...i say one thing in one moment and do the opposite in seconds....a fine example of this is related to my previous post...remember i had this one post which served no purpose what-so-ever other than expressing my extreme boredom (with some fine examples of how to spend your quality time since you suddenly have tons of it)....now i'm feeling vice versa...i got too much to do in so little time...


since i'm in a fine mood to list them down to you, here you go (for entertainment purpose, skip at your own risk!):

  • had to settle some enrolment problem (now that i am not a 'floating' student, i can be a 'non-alien' since i can apply for my visa; such a hassle to apply my visa year after year!)
  • volunteered as a uniguide so 2 days and a half were spent on goodwill (had fun being the 'bully' senior to the newbies...nah, i'm way too nice!ah let's not forget the freebies!lots of extra brunch bars, chocolates, muffins, drink packs and pizzas!see how enduring the malaysian way of 'tapau' here?doggy bags still prevail)
  • still need to write down reports for uniguide (definitely last on the list, not so keen on writing reports, has a higher affinity to writing crap)
  • still need to email my little ducklings (i'm the mother hen...wait, isn't is supposed to be mother duck, goose?) about future meetings etc
  • need to enroll for another paper
  • need to set up a meeting with new apartment agent about contract


i think i still have millions to do!how am i supposed to do all that in a few days?me, the miracle girl!


ah interestingly (noticed i used this word a lot like a dirty dish rag) my experience as a uniguide is very stimulating, to say at the very least...it started off with me coming in late (slunking into the lecture theatre when everything had started an hour earlier, sadly for me my entrance was quite noticable)...then, we had a big breakfast with scones and some other nice sweet stuff (which some i did managed to take home, again blame it on the inbred 'tapau' attitude)...


moving on, it started to rain before we could entice our little lambs to join our little pastures (good analogy for newbies and faculties?)...i deserted my original faculty and joined jae, sol and alex in their little group (how's that for faculty loyalty?)...i screamed the loudest for people to join our nice little group, well that's what malisha and sophie said anyway...being energetic, i happily showed my uniguide members around...i tripped on my words....A LOT!i think some of them looked dazed...too much information to assimilate in too little time...well, i'm what they get, so take me or leave me....


now i feel too exhausted to care whether this post makes sense or not...probably not...need rest....will see you guys later...chaio!

Friday, February 20, 2009

brothel

no i'm not promoting a madam's house (guys should probably know what i mean *wink wink*, not that i'm making generalisation about guys out there)...i'm not planning to list the names of infamous houses around here or any other places for that matter...i haven't even seen the interior of one...though have been curious about it...hehehe....


anyway the thing is, i am a pretty clueless person...you know, someone when you crack a joke, and responded with 'oh wow, really?i didn't know that?wow!'...n you will probably develop a tendency to bash her head to the nearest wall n yell 'hey wake up!i'm making a J.O.K.E here!!!', thus learning that ur nasty caveman tendency has not been weaned out of u during evolution...this year i volunteered to be a person to aid new first year students a.k.a newbies at my school...the main reason of my sudden burst of goodwill is that i thought that i will make my CV looks interesting and thus makes me look like a all-rounder (good impression people)....very mercenary...well, i do have some nice gene people, ye have no faith...


the story behind the long tedious introduction of me becoming a nice person (or not) is that today, during my second training day of being a uniguide, i passed down this building...what's so interesting about this house, you ask?ah this goes a long, long way back (3 years way back) when i was young and innocent....n green...someone i met (don't remember who) told me that there's this house near the clock tower which used to be a high class bordello back then...n yes, being the green goose that i am, i believed him/her...i think i also might have spinned the story a bit...i told some of my other friends that the house right next to hyde park, the one across clock tower, was a whorehouse and now it's still running healthy...it is so high-class that you have to be super rich to be a customer....see how convoluted the story has turned into (it's not a real story in the first place)?


a few years later, i realised my mistake...there is a big sign upfront of the house that announced 'some important house related to uni or something'...the next building is a preschool, for goodness sake!will people ever build a whorehouse next to a preschool (sending all the wrong messages to toddlers out there)?not that i ever check my facts first...now, how did i missed that before?my obliviousness has made me a laughingstock of my nice small group of friends (not that i know whether they believe me or not, probably some of them seriously believed it's true)....


coming back on track, i told this to my friend i met in uniguide, ian...man, he blew his top off lauging...he said it'll be a good story to tell my little sheeps a.k.a noobs (the newbies people)...he made me realised (i told a lot of my uni experience anecdotes) that i do have a lot of stories...he said i will probably make a great uniguide (show some appreciation here, clap you hands please?hahaha)...telling stories will make them relate to me, make the situation less tense and awkward and make them relax...ahhh...his words made me feel warm all over...


come to think of it, you never see what other people see in you...i'm not boasting here...it's true that we have a lot of good qualities or bad traits that we never realise we have...in my case, i do realised that i do talk a lot...most of the time, a bit too much (okay, not a bit, but a lot too much)...i sometimes feel that i make too much effort to share, or i share too much to others' liking...some of them will probably feel so but some of them are happy to talk to me or just listening (as they claim)....


lastly, brothels n bordellos...not my place...but good introduction...grabbed ur attention didn't it?hehehe...

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

hop hop hop


i'm a little green frog, short n stout...bla bla bla...can u feel my boredom here?boredom is seeping from my every little pores, saturating my whole being...boredom which is still not cured after an avid session of clicking to every stupid miscellaneous pages of web that my mouse can get it's little paws on...n it's only been 1 hour and a half after my final summer exam...


i've looked out my window and did a little people watching....interesting that it's raining and seems like NO ONE IS AROUND OUTSIDE!to de-emphasize on my boredom, i tried relaxing and listening to the wee animals chirping happily...not working...need some distraction....


i'm full but decided to cook some curry from the numerous packets of curries that indah passed over yesterday...put a teeny tiny bird's-eye chilli...it's soooo hot that i hopped around....


NEXT!will think of something...should i knock on every door n introduce myself to every one of my neighbours (the ones on the same floor, the ones on the floor upstairs whom one of them vomitted on my window, the ones downstairs whom some of them may be a bit unlucky to listen to my warbled singing every now n then)?




Tuesday, February 17, 2009

type A


have u ever have a conversation in head?i do all the time (does not mean that i need help)...anyway, i was in the shower when I had this glorious conversation about personalities...it’s not about eccentrism or any type of personalities but a group of personalities that identifies a person...type A as opposed to type B...have u eve r heard of these?a type A person is known to be a high achiever, aggressive, has a temper and meticulous...


this type A personality is very well-known in the clinical world...this type of personality is one of precursors of a lot of cardiovascular related diseases and stress (some agree and some not but let’s put things in perspective here...read more on wiki)...thus, what does this signifies (everything has been very straightforward and bit stodgy so far)?this brings me to my next question...am i one?


ah funnily i can pick and choose which symptoms of type A that i have...i can say that i am a high achiever…about 10 years ago…but now, i may accept that i may not achieve as high as possible (but still feel a bit distressed and depressed about it)…do i cry over a B (or C or fail for that matter)?the answer is a no…but do i keep thinking about it, the thought keep on recycling like a hamster running on its wheel, feeling like i wish i can jump off grafton bridge?yup, most definitely…am i suicidal?i’d like to think not but sometimes the thought creeps on my head as i feel like the biggest loser on earth (well most of us humans will feel like this one this one time or another, loser-feeling, not suicidal!if u are seriously feeling suicidal, seek help!)...


i can safely say i am meticulous (though not obsessively, no obssesive-compulsive behavior for me!)...i make a list for almost everything in my little life...list of things i need to do everyday (updated daily), daily budget (updated when expenses occur), yearly budget, list of boxes of stuff i put in storage every year and the list goes on and on (pardon the pun)...my life is said to be ruled by lists...weirdest thing is i rarely make lifelong plan or even short term plans (or rarely stick to them)...if say, i plan to go to the US this winter, there is a strong chance that i will not follow through....


do i have a temper?my whole family can testify to that...but i'm pretty sure 90% of my friends and acquaintances will say that i'm such a 'sweet-natured' person (though i myself will say that i'm no sweet person, i bitch in my head!hahaha)...i rarely lose my temper in public (thus my 'normalness' persona, as opposed to my 'crazy angry bitch' persona witnessed frequently by my poor siblings)...i will usually keep mum for a long while if i get angry when i'm with my friends (as opposed to a bullet-train-speed talker that everyone prays will stop talking asap)....


so with all this material evidence presented, can i safely label myself as a type A person (are u with me so far, or have u skipped most of this post merrily until this part thus have no eartly idea what i'm yapping about?)?i'd say nah...i'm not obsessive about being number one...i can still control my temper (most of the time, mind u don't test me, i can be vicious, meow!)...that meticulous bit, yup i am but so do a lot of people out there (though truthfully i do arrange my clothes according to type and colours in my closet)


are u a type A?be careful...don't break a blood vessel in ur brain!muahahaha (evil laughter)...


Sunday, February 15, 2009

lookin' for L.O.V.E

well the pathetic me make this joke of looking for a bf ALL THE TIME with my gfs...talking to put jolted me out of my patheticness....i'm not really seriously looking for bf for the right reasons such as someone to love etc etc...more like, someone to pay for dinner, presents for bdays n such (such mercenary reasons)....


a friend asked me what should she do if some guy she knows confesses his feelings for her when she has not a speck of affection for him...ah the genius love guru is the one she turned to for la-di-da advice...and why am i a genius love guru u ask?ahhh that's coz i'm never in love, never have a bf before in my freaking 22 years of life (ah give or take a year...or two...older or younger, mind you!clue:i'm talking about my age here), never have any serious crush on ANY GUY, never have any guy HAVING A DEEP PASSIONATE love or crush on me....and so on....


that's the extent of my innocence in love...probably she thought that due to that i have a third person view on love issues (more like my unhealthy addiction to yup, romance books....they rot my brain n perceptions)....anyway back to the real issue here...advice to the lovelorn (or love-u-not)...i'm no more a wise owl than any of u out there on the matters of the heart...i know the basics....my mama taught me a lot (she did have a wide as the ocean experience before my dad....unlike her poor firstborn)


for some examples:
  • never lead a guy on if you have no feelings for him and plans to stay that way....
  • let him down gently (no cursing, no smirking, no spitting...hey no joke...some stupid girls had done this in the past and i'm sure some clueless bimbo will do it again in not so distant future)
  • leading a guy means: accepting dinner dates (here means only u and him n no other pesky gfs), accepting his gifts (no matter how small it is such as daily dinner....that's not small though), treating him like his the god of the universe (cooking for him, talking to him online almost 24/7 and txting and calling him all the time...sounds stalkerish to me)
  • guys can act like a freak if u either lead him on or reject him like he's a disgusting worm on ur toes

moving on to the patheticness of my non-existant love life...i mourn it so...i wish at least some guy has a crush on me!my friend said it's not flattering and weird but ah....to be crushed on (err...doesn't sound right does it)....anyway, i rarely think of my love life....but when someone talks about his/her significant other or asking all sorts of love-hate advice or complaining about his/her loved ones, i feel like running to the streets and kidnap a stranger (a GUY of course) and force him into being my THE ONE until he finally submits....opps, that's a sure way of showing that i have finally done it and break a major blood vessel in my brain...


ah...funny how i want a significant other when i sometimes think it's too much a hassle....well, cupid, i'm all a-quiver waiting for ur arrow to strike right in the middle of my poor heart...please do it soon ya?i want to shuck my pathetic no-lovelife label from smack in the middle of my forehead....stupid cupid!hehehe...

Saturday, February 14, 2009

oh my baby!

further proof that my sisters are indeed a little bit short of their shortbreads...my baby brother is newly introduced to adolescentdom aka acting all macho and all swagger....he's currently in a prison (living in a dormitory for boys) and lo and behold, me the macho boy is acting all tough and yes let's not forget macho....no more mommy's boy act (except in the privacy of our humble abode)...


to get on with the story, one day, out of the blue, he told my whole family that he got transferred to another block....of course being a bunch of old busy body biddies (plus a bit of caring lost somewhere in the action), my dear darling sisters (that being jaja, gegel and alyn) tried to pry him for the all hush-hush reason of his move...


he was proven to be too tough to fall to their oft-used military interrogation tactics...he kept mum...my sisters interest were now in fever pitch...no more miss nice guy...they resort to threat...this is the looniest part of the story....my sisters threaten him with calling him 'BABY ZAYEV' in front of his dormitory yard in full range of hearing of ALL OF HIS MATES!


and it does sounds disgusting....they did it....the called him 'BABY ZAYEV' so many times with so much cloying affection, it's no wonder that my little brother did not act like a sissy boy...jaja even blew him kisses....and my brother's reaction?gave them the finger and shouted '*uck you' with obvious relish....such immaturity despite all his swagger...methinks that mama needs to wash his mouth with soap to cure his cursing tendency....


so people, do u think a normal loving sister will do this to his adolescent brother in front of his friends?that answers ur question on my sisters sanity....

Thursday, February 12, 2009

no sire, yes sire....

gentlemanly man....sigh...so difficult to find these days...upon a long lively discussion with indah, we both concluded that this species is extincting...not that i know many men....most of the men i know here in auckland are malaysians (do i even need to explain?)....i can safely say that most malaysian men i met so far are not that courteous aka gentlemanly....


hmm let me draw a picture of a normal occurance of auckland's malaysian men (again, most of them, not necessarily all of them my dear):

let's say i'm having a late night out with 10 mutual friends, 4 of them are men...it's around 130 am now....my apartment is around 15 minutes walk away from the direction of the rest of the party's respective places....the other girls come in pairs or at least have one or two of the guys accompanying them home since their houses are nearby...me, walking back on the lonely road, yes alone...it's friday night = lot's of drunken youths (or not so-young-homeless people who scare passerby to pass the night)....on the way to my apartment, there is this small stretch of street which is very very dark with lots of place where a body can hide...again, to emphasize my point, i am walking back alone....i made it a point by saying it loudly and clearly 'i am going back alone to my apartment, guys'....the guys have absolutely no reaction to this statement...much kissing, hugging and goodbyes...still no offer of walking back...i ask some of the guys to walk me back, pretty please?uneasy laughters from these so-called guys...one of them pretending not to hear me...another suggest me to take a bus (which is rare at 130 am and to add another point, it stops at the very dark street)....then all of the guys board a bus and leave me to walk home...ALONE! does any of the guys take the initiative to call me 15 minutes later to ask whether i am safely home?or even sending me one measly text message?NOT ONE TEXT RECIEVED!


and here are the same guys that are described as 'such a gentleman!' from their girlfriends....well, to be frank with you girls (the gfs), THEY ARE NOT!being a gentleman does not only mean being nice to the girlfriends' best friends, parents and miscellaneous aunties and uncles or to any beautiful girls...a gentleman treats anyone with courtesy...that means, sending a girl friend who's living far off from the others in the morning...that means offering to take a heavy bag when you see said friend is carrying a lot of bags (which indeed look heavy) and so on...


that said, there are some of this rare species who managed to shock me with their courtliness and niceness....there is this one guy, whom i know since my first year here, who is very softspoken and understanding...he picks me up if we go out together and he sends me home after our date...another guy is a guy i met last year...i have only met him twice, but when he saw me at his apartment building at around 1030 pm, he insisted to send me home (i was visiting my girlfriends and he lives in that building)...he indeed walked me all the way home for no apparent reason than being worried for my safety....


i could fall in love with these men....they are the epitome of modern knights....the rest...err.....needs more polish....i think i must brainwash my little brother to be a nice guy...i don't want my brother to turn up like them....such dissapointment to me....where can i find my knight-in-shining-armour-riding-a-white-porshe then, if the cream of the crops are actually crops who fail to produce cream?sighhhhhhh.......

sistas gone wild

yup my sisters are crazy...i noticed a lot of their bedlamite behaviours but alas...they are my sisters...i found it funny how my sisters 'keep mama on her toes'...i keep on having this image of my sisters giving all sorts of stupid commands like:
  • 'mama, the phone's ringing!it's kak nana!pick it up!hurry!she doesn't have much balance left in her calling card!'
which is absurd...if i'm calling n the phone is ringing, i will not be charged unless someone picks up the phone....n i always make sure i have enough balance to call home....i know mama knows but it's so funny how my sisters can goad my mom into doing funny things like rushing to get the phone (believe me it's absurd to rush on the first ring since my sister knew i was making the call as i was talking to her online at that time)....


anyway, there are more craziness that i can chalk up on my sisters...i can do a list of them (probably make a 1,000 pages book with it!)....

Monday, February 9, 2009

when the machine takes over the world

i can sometimes say i truly hate computer and all things associated to it...i love computers, don't get me wrong...i know at least a medium level of basic knowledge on it's functions...it's just that when it 'ate' up ur work, it can become the most hated thing u've ever known...


this past weeks has proven true to this...2 of my assignment went 'poof' like a magician waving his wand...i had to do one of it all over again (which is mind numbing with all the numbers and functions involved)...another one...well, let's just say i had to hand in my half finished assignment...yes it is my fault to be so careless not to save my file in my thumb drive...yes i am supposed to do and print out my assignment earlier....but nevertheless, this can only happens when u r in desperado mode...


well...what have i learned from all this?yup, to do my assignments earlier and please God remind me to save EVERYTHING in my thumb drive!!!lesson learned...until it happens again...


i AM only human...

Sunday, February 8, 2009

shoe-slut

yes an apt name to be bestowed to me...i love shoes...all sorts, colours designs i love them all....with an exception of cheap slutty-like shoes, i wish i have an endless resources to poured into the shoe industry...just talking about shoes makes me all starry eyed with delirious happiness...acquiring shoes puts me in my private brand of heaven!


anyway, shoes are also my private hell...new shoes that need to be broken in cause me endless blisters...for an example, i bought this gorgeous canary yellow ballet shoes with peekaboo open toes and sadly on my first day of wearing them, i bled all over my poor new shoes...notice here, it is the shoes that are poor, not me...i took off those lovelies and walked barefoot in the heat...i had to wash the back of my shoes as the blood from my blisters (not blisters anymore, it's a huge cut!) with soap...


i had to rest my feet for a few days...and lo and behold, i hurt myself again over shoes...today as i went for my breakfast date with indah, i wore my new flirty purple flats with cute pleat-like ruffles running the the middle of the top...i felt grand...sadly, my cutie purple flats have well, flat soles...the soles are hard and my arches are not supported (hey a girl doesn't worry about little teeny tiny things like arch-support when she goes crazy buying shoes!)...my feet keep on slipping and yes, i got another set of blisters at the bottom of my feet now...they hurt like the very devil...


thinking back, i am never wise in choosing shoes...i keep on buying recklessly, no matter the price, colour, design, suitability to occasions and comfort (i put that absolutely last on my list of priorites)....i wear heels all the time (at home) even though i know surely that i will not feel my feet at the end of the day...my main loss of blood can be directly contributed to blisters and cuts that i endure for the sake of my love for shoes...i invest in buying plasters (band-aid) in bulk just for the sole purpose of breaking new shoes...i overbudgeted just because i can't help myself from putting my much-abused feet in those shoes....


ah the sacrifices women made for passion of fashion....can't say my love for shoes can be dedicated to fashion...it's just that i love shoes....i learn to love shoes earlier than i learn to love clothes and jewelries...they are the only thing that i thought that can fit me (adolescent's body conciousness has a lot to answer for; plus low self esteem)...nowadays, i learn to love my body and find clothes and styles that suit my personality (not that my clothes reflect my sterling personality, you need to know me to appreciate me!hahahaha)...


i am by no means fashionable!i love shoes just because...they are cute...they make me happy...they are affordable (unless u crave for designers which cost about an arm or leg or any organs that matters)...they also give me self confidence in my walk (even though i am usually in pain)


alas shoes have their purpose in my disordered life...here i am dedicating my love to shoes...my favourite colours for shoes?white, red and silver!i have tons of shoes in those colours...my favourite type of shoes?heels, hands down!my favourite style?audrey hepburn and old school peekaboo toed heels!

here's one of my favourite brand (not that i can usually afford it!)...it's called pulp and they got some nice range of shoes every season that always make me salivate in envy...

ah here's a point to ponder boys and girls: if u ever notice me in the same shoes for a whole month, then please shoot me!

Saturday, February 7, 2009

airless room!aidez-moi!

this is a follow-up from my previous post (sounds ominous)...it's been to days n i'm going stark raving mad!i'm running out of fresh air (yes recycled air stinks n i can smell the food i cook on myself, it's not even funny!)...the thing is, if i can open my door n get air, then i wouldn't be this frustrated...my apartment is so darn small it gives of the feeling of an army barrack (u know where the beds are stacked against each other to save space)...i don't exactly hate my room or apartment, it's just that when a certain episode involving vomit and no air is driving me up to my wall!if this happens in winter, then i can always say the unopened window is insulating me from cold....but get this, now is SUMMER!notice the screaming red?it's freaking hot that i sweat like a pig!


yesterday i went out on an errand for a close friend...on the way back, on reflection of my airless room, i panicked and become claustrophobic out of sudden...i stopped in the junction of wakefield and symonds streets (u know the small park where u can find the semi-nude lady and a small park bench) and sat on the aforementioned bench...i was protected by the trees (which i'm thankful for, i'm no fan of the sun at the moment, or any other moments) and there was a nice breeze cooling the air...i sat and stared at nothing stupidly for a few minutes and felt at ease (after my recent fight with airlessness)...a guy friend stopped by when he saw me and asked whether i was waiting for a friend...i debated whether to save face and lie or tell him the truth...i did the latter coz it's so useless to lie....


then, today i recieved a msg from another friend telling me that he saw me 'contemplating my future with such seriousness etc etc'....well....truly i need fresh air...i was about to go crazy here...these few days are so warm i wonder where all the rain auckland is famed for has gone to?is this God divine punishment for all my sins (and future ones i'm sure i will definitely commit)....hehehe...need fresh cooling air...hellppppppppp........

Friday, February 6, 2009

my inner bitch (or wholebody bitchiness)

i am a bitch...well not exactly....but today as i opened my eyes i realised that i can act like a queen bitch sometimes...i am a bit judgmental and very defensive and loves to argue...i can honestly say that my judgmentalism is more like selective judgmentalism...i judge whom i hate...i am also a contrary person...say if someone told me that she plans to eat at one of my favourite restaurant and asks me out for dinner at that place, i will suddenly say that i will prefer to eat at another place...my contrariness sometimes drives me crazy (like i'm having all this internal debate on whether i should act spiteful or not, with the benefits of course)....


i also realised that if i hate (too strong a word, probably closer to dislike than hate) a person, i can bitch about him/her on and on without losing resources...things that i usually tolerate with another person like a girl who loves to put on make-up can be translated that the girl is a vain-biatch...i purposely misunderstood that person, like if she said 'oh i personally don't suit that kind of dress' will be translated as 'oh u have an atrocious sense of fashion and i would not be caught dead in that ugly dress!' and i will proceed to 'dislike' her more...


oh i would never ever bitch about the people that i dislike openly to anyone....i am somehow reserved about talking of my dislikes of others....but if i meet somehow who shares the mutual 'dislike' or my close family members, how i can spend hours and hours bitching on that person...funny at the end of the particular bitching session, i will snap out of my bitchiness-trance and realise that i am not super perfect to comment on another person so openly...i will end the conversation piously (well usually if i remember) by saying 'well i am not that perfect either so yeah, maybe that's just how i feel and she is not exactly as bad that all that....i don't even know if people genuinely like me or just be able to barely tolerate me'...after the said conversation, i feel like the other person that i talk to will think that i'm such a spiteful person....


miraculously, i can act like i am such of a good friend of the so-called 'disliked' person...it's a wonder because i always have this inner comments popping in my brain whenever i talk to this person....it's like when he said things like 'oh i missed you so much' and suddenly this reply will pop out of nowhere 'oh how i was in 7th heaven when you were not here!and now i'm back in purgatory'....not that i verbalise my feelings...i wonder if these people realise that i dislike them...


i guess in the end i will never know...i don't even know if, in general, people like me...i don't lose sleep over it but i do wonder if others are like me, pretending tolerance and friendliness but knowing inside it is all fake....not that i dislike many people as i found it difficult to dislike a person...i like most of people that i meet and it is unusual for me to make judgments so early in my acquaintance (or make judgments at all)...i personally think that i can tolerate a lot of difficult personalities and eccentricities but there will be one or two person in this whole universe whom i just can't help of feeling repelled to...it's like there are something about them that i just can't take it...


in the end, i think i can behave beautifully if i mind myself...i'm not a jungle animal who doesn't know where to pounce and where to stop...i am only human...my bitchiness is my failing (as i do have many, failings that is) and i am thinking whether i should keep it or ditch it...bitchiness does help me from being overly naive...alas, this debate of bitchiness will continue (i'm very attached to my inner bitch)....hehehe...

Thursday, February 5, 2009

music....again...

today is such a mixed-feelings kind of day for me...first i feel like i must state this: somebody got too drunk on the pink champagne or ate too much korean kimchi and vomitted (yes, the disgusting weird, smelly, disgusting looking half digested mixture of food or what's left of it that our tummy reject and we eventually evicts through our mouth) through his window....and what's that got to do with me, you say?well first of all, i was the recepient of the just-said vomit (or more accurately my window that i relies on my very soul to send me all the fresh air into my tiny cramped cell-like room)...it's appalling smelling and all the gooey slimy things got stuck on my window...now all i can see is gross-looking rejected things as my scenery...secondly, the smell was god-awful, save me god!i had to spray half bottle of what's-left-of-last-year's lemon airwick (air freshner, and let me say this, my air ain't getting any fresher by seconds!n thank god for last year's last minute guilt that saved me from throwing it away in fit of moving out flurry)...a bit frozen at first as i didn't recognise the smell but i can hear the sound of fluid falling from the 'sky'....hey it's 12.30 am in the morning...n tomorrow is indeed a holiday....getting to much fun, mate?

anyway moving on from a topic so depressing and disgusting, i found a bit of musical heaven again today...



my current flatmate, malene (pronounced malena), who's on her round-the-world trip from Denmark introduced this delightful song to me...well not exactly 'introduced' since i've heard of this song before...janus (pronounced yanus) played this song on his iPod (attached to evie's iPod speaker, so yes the song traveled by 'air osmosis' through my room door) repeatedly last year...he did promised to share the song with me but sadly he got distracted and as for me, i also got distracted by my messy life...anyway, this song is called 'et sidste kys' by 'nik og jay' featuring 'julie berthelsen'...apparently nik og jay are very idolised especially by youngsters in Denmark...most of their songs are about 'parties, drinking, any interesting parts of women's body and enjoying life' to quote malene...but every once in a while they did make an effort to convey deeper emotions through their songs like this particular one...julie berthelsen is a runner up of the tv show 'popstars'...her voice is indeed beautiful and haunting in this song....


et sidste kys literally means one last kiss...as i heard and watched the video, malene translated some of the lyrics for me and i fell deeper in love...she said it is about one final kiss from a beloved woman to a man who realised that he loved her too late....she's leaving and he's reminiscing on the their love and times together....she is coming home to kiss and hold him for a final time...in the end he realised that he would heal and be alright....such tragic...


this is what i got from one of the videos...a person ran the danish lyrics through an online translation program and this is what he got:

The things she said to me go round and round
I know that one can get used to everything, but it hurts
Time heals all wounds, they say
But when is it?
When will it be?
Phrases from yesterday in my head
I wake up alone, there is blood on my pillow
My soul is empty
I had never seen this coming
And although the ratio went up and down and back and forth as we sang again
I have always claimed to be a gentleman
But perhaps I was not one to you
So it hurts me, I know I forgot to hold the door open for you in the end
Forgot to give you a kiss in the morning before I went
Forgot to keep alive the spark that we two started
I was probably a little too much into money and parties
But never had I thought that you were so frustrated with me that you would drift away from me
I heard well what you said to me yesterday
It's just like everything inside of me still does not understand

I come home at night
To hold you tight
And to tell you that
This will be the last kiss
I come home at night
But although I won't be here when you wake up, baby
I know everything will be okay

You came out of nothing, but I think I was ready
For you stirred something up in me, which I thought I had lost,
So I let it float, took one day at a time
With an image in my head of you and me together
For you had everything that, all the others could not give me
And I had a feeling that you really liked me
So I told you what I felt and that this summer could be ours
Even if all odds were against us
From dreams to reality by giving up to go on
I thought we made the most of it
But just as quickly as it came, it was gone again
And we each went our way out of
Beautiful things go, beautiful things come
And I fell for you that summer
But I know there was a meaning, it should not have been the two of us
And you should know I understand what you said to me now

I come home at night
To hold you tight
And to tell you that
This will be the last kiss
I come home at night
But although I won't be here when you wake up, baby
I know everything will be okay

Okay --
I know that it will be okay
In time it everything will be okay
I am strong enough to start anew


now i keep playing this song over and over again (old habit die hard)...i even stay up late just to keep listening to this song (such devotion, why can't i have the same devotion to my textbooks?)...


sometimes i feel so weird that i can feel so deeply for a song or a book...when i look back, i think i have a relatively normal childhood and teenage hood....i felt like i wasn't an angsty teen but then again who am i to say (since that is how i see myself, not others)...i cried over lyrics and words in songs...i cried when lilo's sister was explaining that their family is what they hold in their heart (lilo and stitch, how pathetic can i be?)....i mostly cried alone so that others wouldn't see me crying my eyes out...i remember i read p/s:i love you the book a few years ago and stop reading after 2 pages since i couldn't stop my tearducts from being productive...i cried reading chicken soup the series (the books, not the liquid food or the drama series)....i think i'm so out of touch with my own reality (it's rare for me to show public affection like giving hugs and kisses....i also feel awkward in emotional situations) that i convey my emotions through these mediums....


anyway, on a light note, i had fun at kak ana's house on forte's building today (though kak ana's not there since she's still in malaysia at that moment)...went there to pick up some stuff that i left at kak ana's during the summer holiday...the girls (fadzilah, fadilah, samirah, ana, nolly) were so giving and friendly....as usual, my mouth ran before my head can catch up...i remember talking about belacan (shrimp paste), how i can't live without chilli, the UV level in auckland, lotion and sunscreen, maths and my struggle with it, my sister jaja who is doing her master now, shopping,stephanie meyer's twilight series (the books again) and on and on...they served me a nice dinner of chicken rice which i enjoyed to the max and they proceeded to make mocha ice-blended (their version of it) 4 times that i felt so truly full by the end of the dinner...i even got a small package of shrimp paste as door gift!hehehe...


okay, here's the end of this endless post...looking foward for the long weekend (happy waitangi people!) and not-so-looking foward to do my assignments!ah and enjoy your kiwi experience malene!hope you have fun and go crazy!sky dive again since u really love it!

Monday, February 2, 2009

fav music

i have listened to many songs from pop to club and frankly i believe that my taste in music is developing...i still love to listen to pop (sure, i admit pop song are lovable n very light n entertaining) but i'm loving new genres that u wouldn't have caught me dead listening before....i think i'm expanding my horizon and loving the experience so far....

i would love to say that i tend to listen to r&b nowadays but i'm not sure that's entirely true...anyway i love korean songs and oldies...my favourite japanese singer is utada hikaru (faithfully listening to her all these years) and m-flo (an eclectic band with a lovely twist of jazz) is my band of choice...of course to those who knows me i'm a massive fan of mariah carey...some of favourite korean bands are loveholic and clazziquai...

okay!enough of my rants!i would love to share one of my favourite track by loveholic called 'sad movie'...enjoy!


wonder girls and addiction


it's entirely my younger sisters' (jaja and alin) fault that i got addicted to this song...it's called nobody by wonder girls...it's catchy and entertaining but by all means not a mariah carey's calibre...but then again i got so hooked up by the song, i even dance while singing it!i watched the video n surprisingly it's such a funny video with JYP continuously getting stuck in the toilet!hehehe....


anyway, i missed my daily dose of chilli so much!today i even added 10 tablespoons worth of blended chilli in my butter chicken (sans chicken and didn't taste like butter chicken at all!hahahaha, that's what u get from a bottle!)...n fuh i cried while eating my dinner...it's that hot!i even drank with a gallon of plain water (estimation)....


still listening to wonder girls - nobody...missing dancing so much!i used to dance and sing all the time but those days seems locked in the past (phew such melodrama)...the only dancing that i do these days are lonely dancing....i feel so crazy after i dance the night away...i feel like i'm somehow losing my mind!


singing and dancing reminds me of my other passion...reading...i stayed up until 3 am yesterday to read a book...now i'm regretting it coz i felt dizzy n restless...lack of sleep did that to u...ah today i met a very nice person...her name is petra and she is very open minded and matured...i feel happy that i make a friend today...wow somehow i sound like a pathetic friendless person!hahahaha....anyway, i'm enjoying my day even though i feel like i'm outside of my body, observing how my day passes by (lack of sleep, u devil!)!


sorry for the skippy post...my mind is not on the right track...excuse the weirdness of this particular post...

Sunday, February 1, 2009

old songs...

old songs are comfortable...reminds me of taking tea while thinking of none of the serious matters of financial planning, the future, world economy or political war and mayhem...i keep on plugging my external hard disc and listening to old songs...today my behaviour is taken to another level as i played an array of old pop songs while singing on top of my lungs...i imagine those who lived nearby would wonder who has lost her mental faculty on a nice sunny sunday...well, tomorrow is monday so i'm having a pre-monday-blues....


ahhh...my weekend surprisingly kicked off on a nice note...i went to parnell and newmarket on 2 consecutive days (friday and saturday) and i was enjoying my visits...went to look at a couple of apartment for a friend and enjoying my trips...parnell was pleasant and as usual newmarket on a weekend is full of ppl shopping and having fun...


i also had a fun dinner date with indah...she cooked a really lovely curry mee and i brought ice-cream...it's maple syrup and walnut Killinchy Gold n it has the yummy-melt-in-my-mouth kinda afterglow...we talked, laughed at american idol's contestants antics n bitch around....it was tres fabulous!


then i remembered my untouched dirty laundry....i hate doing laundry...i don't know why but it smacked the feeling of laundry-slavery to me...sometimes i'm so fastidious i have to handwash some of my clothing articles which is difficult in my circumstances since i don't have the space to hang them dry....but alas...it needs to be done n done it is...


now listening to mandy moore's only hope...i was belting selena's dreaming of you just now n i realize i am no singer....but a girl can have fun!fun weekend!fun fun fun!hehehe....
 
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