Saturday, February 13, 2010

the bitch named NAZURAINI

driving and learning to drive, so far, have been a harrowing experience for me...the first initial lessons were scary...they were scary in the sense of unknown, since i've never ever tried to move a real car before...then, the lessons got better...sure i am no michael schumacher and i am definitely not betting my whole entire so-far-has-been-useless life on doing the 'drift' as mad called it anytime soon...probably not for my entire miserable life...the lessons got better as i got more confident that i wouldn't kill a person while behind the wheels and could reasonably be able to move the car in a reasonable, if not that competent, manner from point A to point B....


i haven't dreamt of hitting an old lady who is walking on the side road for a while...then it came to the crunch time...the driving test...it was, to put it mildly, simply horrendous...to start off, i was scared shitless...i was full of anxiety and sweat like a squealing piglet, my tummy was doing a full cartwheels a thousand times a minute, my bowel were not in control and my bladder screamed bloody murder every 3.6 seconds...u get what i mean...i was just scared...if i fail this time, i'd know it's my own fault...


to understand better of malaysian driving test, let me give u a small preview of it...it consists of 2 major parts...a test on the driving course (they constructed a huge driving course for this part) and a test on the road...the test on the driving course consists of a test on a built 'hill' (reasonably steeped), parking test and a '3-points turn' test...all must be done within 11 minutes, 3 minutes for the 'hill' and '3-points turn' and 5 minutes for the parking test...the test on the road consists of a route filled with landmines such as T-junction, traffic lights, stop signs, double lines, other cars on the road, highway (or motorway), U-turn, small roads, roundabout, hilly area and so on...in simple terms, for a starter, it is hell on the road...


anyway, i could confidently say that, though not a really great driver, for a starter i am a competent, if a bit shaky, driver...i would say, though i wouldn't kill another soul on the road, i could drive...in the end that's what really matters right?....that i can drive....but, sadly i was like a convicted felon on the judge stand, unable to relax and full of anxiety...i couldn't fake it...so i know, if i fail this time, it would be my fault (emphasize this, i fail, my own fault)...


i passed the hill test, but failed the parking test...again, it was my own failure to relax and do it properly, i was hasty...since i failed parking, i was automatically ousted for the '3-points turn' test....fine...now it's the test on the road time...again i was like a setting mass of jellylike movements...my engine died on me 3 times, which didn't surprise me the least since i couldn't concentrate...


the main problem here is this: the examiner for the test on the road...in simple terms, she's:

  • a bitch who didn't 'get it last night' (if u get what i mean)
  • a m**ther-**cker
  • a first class whore
  • a pmsing bitch
  • did i mention a bitch?
i didn't blame her for my failure but i did blame her for making the whole experience nasty, leaving a bad taste in my mouth and making me feel like a sore loser and quitting before even trying again...


i know as a rule female examiner are rumored to be not easy to deal with, the are full of hormones and shit, but this bitch, she took it to the next level...before i expound this bitchiness fact in detail, let me first explain that the examiners for the driving test are government officers from the malaysian road transport department (JPJ)...and believe me they are full of shits...the took bribe...as in u know, money to give a pass to people who are willing to part with their cash...the currently the bribery fee is around rm 200...


so...they are just con artists...no offense but please, if u took bribe, don't be judgmental and look like the Grinch who stole christmas...first of all, most of them (i can safely say all of them) are not even highly educated, no sire...no university education for these guys...but they got power and they are corrupted, so hell yeah, let's make these candidates sweat off their undies, shall we?....


her name is NAZURAINI BT MAT YUSOF....she's in her mid-20's to early 30's...very corrupted and had a holier-than-thou attitude, like she's all that...she keep 'tski'ng me, not in a cute grandmotherly way, instead, u know, the bitchier way...she kept moving her body on the passenger seat like she couldn't bear to look at my face and finally, when i had exhausted my chance of passing, she acted like the ultimate bitch...


i am being a bitch here coz it's my right to vent my spleen and well, i am still mad at the way she handled things...she could've just give me a fail and be done with it in the first place...oh no, she had to be the bitch and take the prize...the first words coming out of that bitch's mouth were 'I JUST HAD IT WITH U!' (yes in capital letters) and things went downhill afterward....who are u?...my mother?...which part of me that 'u've just had'?...u just don't have the right!...i called like a million people, bitching on this bitch afterward, i don't even want to go into the express details anymore...


so here i go...bitch, if by off chance u read this (presuming u can reasonably read english and be able to use the net), i meant to call u bitch to ur face today...but alas, my early lessons of good manners from my mama and teachers are just too deeply ingrained...i can only just do it behind ur back...but if u read this....i meant what i said...may u rot in hell for passing those who give u the 'sweetened' money (bribery) while lecturing me about driving safely and for giving me hell today...may u die in an accident in a horrible way, just to show that u said one thing to my face and break every single road rules out there in real life...


conclusion: i'm done venting my spleen...case close...


1 comments:

fairuzruez said...

omg. i dapat die kot ujian memandu.then i failed time dekat jalan raya.fuck her damn much!

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